I’m (Not) Complaining But . . .

All people complain. Jews elevated complaining to a holy art. Just read the Torah. The text is peppered with complaints. Perhaps Torah anticipated the “gig” economy, where the world revolves around the threat of complaints. I’m not complaining, but . . .

Just after exiting Egypt, complaining began. Scared and untethered, the people wondered why they had left Egypt to die in the desert. In parshat Beshalach, before and after the miracle of crossing the sea people complained to Moses. What could be the Torah’s purpose in sharing this unpleasant side of the newly freed slaves? I believe that the Torah demonstrates that faithlessness is the underpinning complaining. Among the newly freed slaves, fidelity to God was tenuous. Whether chased by Egyptian troops or shadowed by hunger, the people lost conviction and hope. To demonstrate that point, the Torah preserved their complaints forever.

Yet, Rabbi Irwin Kula taught that complaining can also be understood as a yearning for a better world. The barren wilderness of Sinai was certainly not as attractive as the lush banks of the Nile or the milk and honey laden Promised Land. Complaints may also be born of a motivation to seek a better life.

In the modern “gig” economy, complaining has become the guarantor of successful commercial transactions. Whether Uber or Airbnb, complaints posted on the internet inform our faith in the unknown service provider. Yet, I have observed that the system has its weaknesses. In one Airbnb house rental, the owner advised me not to post a critical review of her home or she would post a critical review of us. In another case, I posted a complaint about the noise level in a small boutique hotel, before I had checked out. The owner quickly tracked me down and begged me to remove the negative comment as it might affect his livelihood. Otherwise, my complaints would hover on the internet forever.

At the airport, there are red, yellow, and green buttons at the TSA checkpoint and outside the bathroom. Did you find the bathroom experience satisfying? If so, press the green button. If not, press the red. As I don’t believe that my pressing a button will have any impact, I’d rather not touch another germ ridden point of contact.

There is a connection between complaining and faith. If we believe that change is possible, we should offer constructive criticism.  On the other hand, we can believe that grousing and complaining is an entitlement. Complaining for the sake of personal expression will always result in diminished spirit. Torah is teaching us that complaining without faith is puerile and unproductive, perhaps even destructive. Appreciation fills our soul with hope.

I’m not complaining, but I’d like to hear less complaining and more appreciation. Next time I might just press the green button.

Rabbi Evan J. Krame